"The Bermuda Triangle Effect"
(A spread of blue lightning bolts, spanning a few lightyears in diameter travels its natural course through the Beta Quadrant...awwww...)
(On
the Phoenix-X, Bridge)
Lieutenant
Commander Armond[human]: The Ion Storm is approximately 16 lightyears in
diameter.
Commander Night
Gotens[trill]: An Ion Storm of that magnitude could disintegrate
our ship within nano seconds; which will definitely over cook the blood
pieta's we're having for lunch today.
Ensign
Dan[bajoran]: Wohoo! Go for it.
Captain
Daniel[changeling]: Ensign, you are relieved.
Ensign
Dan: You bet I am, this deodorant is really effective.
Lieutenant
Elly[orion](walks onto the Bridge form the Turbolift): Ensign Dan! The
computer reports that you were in my quarters at 07:00 using my Deodorant
for Orion Women!
Ensign
Dan: Uh oh….gotta transwarp!
(Ensign
Dan runs into the turbolift, Elly chases after him)
Daniel:
Well I guess we can't go through the Ion Storm. Didn't Starfleet notify
us about this?
Gotens:
We're a secret ship, not much of Starfleet knows about the Phoenix-X. In
other words, we ain't got the latest info, we ain't hip, we don't got no
game.
Daniel:
What are you talking about? We got game.
(Suddenly
red alert goes on)
Armond:
Captain, we're under attack from the Carthaginians again.
(The
ship shakes)
Daniel:
Not again, I thought we settled our conflict with them.
Gotens:
We could easily destroy them you know--
Daniel:
No! I have direct orders from Starfleet to not harm them! Besides, these
battle scenes are so repetitive.
Armond:
They're hailing.
Daniel:
Ignore. Red, engage Transwarp 6, now.
Red:
But--
Daniel:
Just do it!
Red:
Okay, okay.
(A small Carthaginian ship fires at the Phoenix-X. The Phoenix-X accelerates into Transwarp)
(On
the Phoenix-X, Bridge)
Daniel(sits):
Only if you hadn't flirted with their Captain!
Gotens:
Sorry, my bad.
Red:
Captain, something's wrong. We're losing velocity.
(The Phoenix-X, still inside the Transwarp Conduit, suddenly stops)
(On
the Phoenix-X, Bridge)
Gotens
What happened?
Armond:
I don't understand--we just stopped.
Daniel:
In a Transwarp Conduit? That's not possible…is it?
Armond:
Well it shouldn't be--but it is.
(The Phoenix-X hovers within the orange wormhole-like Conduit)
(On
the Phoenix-X, Bridge)
Armond:
I'm checking sensors...
(Kugo
enters the Bridge)
Daniel:
What do they say?
Armond:
They just say we're in the conduit.
Gotens:
Thanks for the new piece of information. I don't get it...we're in Transwarp,
the fastest way of traveling known to the Federation--well some of the
Federation, and we're not going anywhere! I need some blood pieta.
Kugo:
The engines are still holding the Transwarp Conduit.
Armond(looks
at the control panel): Hmm...
Daniel:
What?
Armond:
Well, when we go into a Transwarp Conduit, we don't use impulse to travel
through it, that'd just be too slow, we travel along Transwarp Waves that
just carry us through the tunnel until we exit it.
Daniel:
Yeah, so what?
Armond:
Well, sensors indicate that where we are, there are no Transwarp Waves.
Daniel:
Then the question is...why are there no Transwarp Waves?
Gotens:
Who cares? Let's just turn off the Transwarp and try it again, or go through
the Conduit wall and start another Conduit.
Kayl:
I think I know why there are no waves. When Red engaged the Transwarp Conduit,
he made it go through the Ion Storm ahead of us.
Kugo:
Yeah! The Ion Storm must be neutralizing the Transwarp Waves.
Kayl:
Exactly.
Daniel:
Wait, then that means there are no Waves for at max, 16 Lightyears. Tong,
how long is the Conduit?
Tong:
21 Lightyears, sir.
Gotens:
Well, why don't we just get out of this Conduit?
Kugo:
We can't, we're inside the Ion Storm. The ship would be torn apart. We
can't even initiate a detour Conduit.
Daniel:
We can't?
Kugo:
Well theoretically speaking.
Daniel:
Okay, there are waves behind us and there are waves ahead of us. Why are
they so far away?
Red:
I suspect the ships' momentum brought us out this far.
Daniel:
If we used Impulse Engines, how long would it take to reach the nearest
waves?
Armond:
The nearest waves are ahead of us, and it would take approximately...one
year and two months to reach them on impulse. To reach the waves behind
us, it would take a year and five months. But after we reached the waves,
they'd just carry us outta the conduit.
Daniel:
Only if we had a faster way of propulsion.
Walace:
So we can't fly through the wall of the conduit, the Ion Storm would destroy
us...but we can try to reach the end of it.
Red:
I initiated a predestination jump, which means there's an opening at the
other end to the Conduit.
Armond(taps
on the control panel): I've created a diagram of our situation to help
us further solve the problem, on screen.
(The
diagram goes on screen)
Gotens(shakes
his head): We got stuck in our own Transwarp Conduit, heh, we are just
idiots. You know, in a day, we are just gonna look back on this and laugh.
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha, ha...
(Everyone
looks at him)
Gotens:
...Heh, heh...maybe a week.
Daniel:
Waitaminute... does this mean the Conduit is still open at both ends?
Armond:
Yeah, why?
(Suddenly the Carthaginian Ship, the S.S. Hannibal, flies through the Conduit and stops beside the Phoenix-X. The Hannibal opens fire on the Phoenix-X)
(On
the Phoenix-X, Bridge)
Walace:
Cap--
(The
ship shakes)
Walace:
I recommend we refrain from open fire within the conduit.
(The
ship shakes again)
Daniel:
But--
Kugo:
He's right, these outbursts of torpedoes could distort and maybe destroy
the conduit, which in turn would destroy us both.
(The
ship shakes)
Walace:
Shields to 87%.
Armond:
Captain! Another ship has fallen into our distressing trap.
Daniel:
Do you have to be so dramatic?
Armond:
It's a Klingon Bird of Prey, the Hou-Ling. They're opening fire on the
Hannibal.
Kugo:
We can't have them firing either!
Gotens(glances
at the Captain): Looks like it's time to be diplomatic.
Daniel(grumbles):
Okay. Armond, hail them.
(The Carthaginian has just destroyed the Klingon Bird of Prey. It was not so hard because the bird of prey wasn't built to withstand the conduit.)
(On the Carthaginian)
Captain Tweed: Yes?!?
*Daniel: I am Captain Daniel-X
of the starship Pheonix-X of the Federation. If you do not cease your attack,
it will be the end of us all.
Tweed: Hah! This is your
fault. You were going to violate our home.
*Daniel: That is not true.
We are no where near your home.
Tweed: This is our home!
*Daniel: "This" What does
that mean? The storm is your home?
Tweed: This is no storm.
I guess to you it might be. So you are saying you don't know where our
home is.
*Daniel: Yes.
Tweed: We need to talk.
*Daniel: Yes we do. Kayl,
are transporters operational?
*Kayl: Yes.
(Captain Tweed is transported
to the Pheonix-X with an engineering officer of his.)(In the conference
room, where the senior officers and Carthaginians talk.)
Dummy(He points to the computer
screen): As you can see this so called "storm" is a shielding protecting
our home. Our home is located here. (He points to his home on the diagram.)
Ensign Dan: So let me get
this straight. Your name is "Dummy"? Hahahahahahahaha!!!!
Daniel: ENSIGN! Get a hold
of yourself. You are relieved.
Dummy: What is so funny?
(He walks to a chair and trips on his way)
(Ensign is about to get
out of the door but sees him trip.)
Ensign Dan: Hahahahahahahahaha!
(He laughs as he exits.)
Gotens: Now that is funny.
Dummy: That wasn't funny.
Humph!
Tweed: Anyways, as Dummy
was saying, this storm is our shield. We saw you heading this way and thought
you were going to attack our home. So we tried to stop you. But can you
explain what are we in?
Red: We are in a transwarp
conduit. We didn't want to engage you because you could've been destroyed
like that.
Tweed: Thanks a lot.
Red: Anyways, it happens
that our conduit ran through your shielding. We penetrated it because of
our vast speed but because your shielding is so great in distance, that
was enough time for it to neutralize the waves in the conduit that make
it necessary for us to go so fast.
Tweed: If you are suggesting
that we shut down the shield, you are wrong. Our home would be left open
to attack at anytime. We can't have that.
Daniel: Well, then there
is only one way for us to get out alive, we have to exit the way we came
in or exit at the end of the conduit.
Tweed: My ship was damaged
when we entered this thing.
Dummy: I say that our ship
will be torn apart in one hour.
Daniel: You guys heard the
dummy. We have one hour.
Dummy: I got it. Our ship
is way beyond repair in time. How about if we change the shields on this
ship.
Gotens: He's not a dummy
after all.
Dummy: Hey.
Daniel: All right. Dummy,
work with my chief engineerer Kugo and BOB to get those shieldings done.
I want results. Captain Tweed, you have 45 minutes to transport all your
crew to our ship. You can take any cargo bay. Dismissed.
(50 minutes have elapsed.
99.6% of the Carthaginian crew have been transported. Captain Tweed still
remains on the Carthaginian.)
*Daniel: Captain, return
to the ship. Everyone has been transported.
Tweed: The ships breaking
apart. My poor baby. Just have to get something.
*Daniel: All right. Make
it fast.
Tweed: Got it. Ready for
transport.
(The Captain was transported.)
Daniel: Engineering, are
all modifications done?
*Kugo: Yes. Ready down here.
(Tweed walks into the bridge
with a jar in his hand.)
Daniel: Nice of you to join
us. All right. Raise modified shields.
(Lightning wraps around
the ship. The shield's characteristics are that electricity bands spark
up around the ship randomly.)
Armond: This is cool.
Gotens: Helm, deactivate
the conduit.
(The conduit dissapates.
They are in the storm shield. Their shields are holding.)
Gotens: Okay, take us out
of here.
(The Pheonix-X jumps to
warp.)
(Meanwhile, on the bridge.)
Captain Tweed: Captain,
I have something for you.
(Tweed gives Daniel the
jar.)
Daniel: What is that?
Tweed: It's a changeling.
We sealed it in this jar.
Daniel: Uh! Where did you
get it and why did you seal it.
Tweed: When we destroyed
that Klingon vessel, we beamed over who ever was on it. It turns out that
it was a Changeling. I thought this would mean more to you than it to me.
Daniel: Uhhh...thanks. (Daniel
takes the jar.)
*Daniel: Captain's log, supplemental. We've just left the Carthaginain Central Command Centre, a large non-moving comet they live on that has total control over the ion storm, after transporting the Carthaginian crew over. They've cleared a "normal space" pathway for the Pheonix-X, leading out of the ion storm, and improved our shields and our impulse engines by 200%, making us able to almost reach a Warp 1 speed!! Since we're in their territory, I've adhered to their demands not to use Transwarp; but that's no problem now, thanks to the upgrade. As a gift to saving their lives, they've given us what seems to be a Changeling...
(On the Pheonix-X, the Captain
enters Sickbay)
Lox: So I says to her, I
says--
Gotens: Captain, we were
just about to call you.
Daniel: Have you opened
the jar with the Changeling inside?
Gotens(tries twisting it
open): Arrghh--the lid--is--stuck-- Does anyone have a rubber glove or
something?
Daniel(snatches the jar
away from him): Give me that!
(Daniel opens the jar and
a goo of changeling speews out onto the floor. The changeling goo transforms
into a humanoid figure. The humanoid changeling forms a face, limbs and
grows hair)
Gotens: Kinda like a chia
pet.
Daniel: Computer, erect
a level 1 force field around the Changeling.
(A force field goes around
Daniel)
Daniel: No, the other Changeling.
(The force field deactivates
around him and goes around the other changeling figure)
Lox: The Changeling's protoplasum
does not seem to be infected with that disease. So it's okay to link, I
think. What a coinkidink.
Daniel(walks over): Who
are you?
Lox: I'm the Doctor.
Daniel: Not you. I'm talking
to the Changeling.
Lox: Oh.
Shane: I am Shane, son of
Sergio.
Gotens: Sergio? Aaaaahhhahahahahahahahahahaaa!!!
........Go on.
Daniel: How can you be the
son of anyone? You're a Changeling.
Shane: I was found and raised
by Klingons, you know how it is. Where am I?
Daniel: Allow me to introduce
myself. I am Captain Daniel of the Federation starship Pheonix-X.
Shane: You? A Captain? Aaaahahahahahahahahahahahahaa!!!
.......Go on.
Daniel: You were beamed
off the Hou-Ling before it was destroyed. The aliens that destroyed you
then gave you to us...in a jar.
Shane: I hate jars. Now
jugs, jugs are nice.
Gotens: So what's your story,
Sergio? Why were you on a Klingon ship?
Shane: Well it all started
a long time ago... I was a young lad, full of hope and joy--
Gotens: No, no. On second
thought, don't tell us.
Shane: Basically, I was
found and raised by Klingons. Didn't I already tell you that?
Gotens: Yeah, about 9 lines
up.
Shane: I lived on the Hou-Ling
for so long, I can't beleive it's destroyed...everyone dead...
Daniel: Not everyone is
dead.
Shane: Someone survived!?
Daniel: Yeah, you. Hahahaha!
Shane(wines): Aww...
Lox(replicates a piece of
wood): You people are so wierd.
Daniel: No, but seriously.
I did some checking up on the Hou-Ling, it seems that Captain Sergio was
on Risa when his ship got sucked into the Transwarp conduit and destroyed.
Gotens: Why does that name
sound so familliar....?
Shane: He's alive!? Oh thank
the Changelings! He's my mentor, you know.
Gotens: Oh yeah.
Daniel: We sent a communication
to him, he should be on his way to meet us at the end of this ion storm.
Shane: Thank you Captain,
I will not forget the deed you have done for me.
Daniel: That's good.
Shane: Could you write it
down on a pad so I don't forget?
Daniel: Uhh...no. Doctor,
release the force field.
(The force field deactivates)
Daniel: This changeling
is no harm to us.
Shane(raises his arms in
gratitude, hitting Gotens in the face): Thank you!!....sorry.
(The two Changelings walk
out of the room, talking)
Lox: Anyways. So I says
to her, I says...
(The Pheonix-X treks through
the normal space tunnel within the ion storm)
*Gotens: Fisrt Officers
log, stardate 52656.12. It's been a while since I've recorded a ship's
log, so I'll keep this shor--
(The Pheonix-X continues
to trek through the normal space tunnel within the ion storm, the next
day)
*Gotens: First Officers
log, stardate 52656.13. I accidentally preset my log time too short, yesterday,
so I made it extra longer today. I......I...I have to go to the sonic-washroom.
Be right back!!.........Aaahhhh!!....Aaahhhh...
(15 minutes later)
*Gotens: Okay, where was
I? Oh yeah. I--
(The log cuts out)
(On the Bridge of the ship)
Gotens(inserts another quarter
and speaks clearly): First Officers log, supplimental.
(The ship does its trekking
thing)
*Gotens: A lot of wierd
stuff has been goin' on during these past weeks. I've noticed that Shane
and the Captain have been bonding a lot. That doesn't bother me because
I've been doin' a little bonding myself. There's this fine girl from Astrometrics.
Her name is Jineen and she has the biggest--
*BOB(voice in the background): Uhh, Commander?
*Gotens: Oh, right, right.
It's obvious to the crew that the Captain would trust his life with Shane
and so would Shane to the Captain. Which brings me to my next point, will
the Changeling want to go back be under command of the klingon Captain
Sergio? Which brings me to my next point, if our uniforms are black and
grey, I don't think our underwear should be pink and brown--
*BOB: Ahem, Commander, the
ships logs aren't supposed to be of personal nature. And our uniforms don't
have any br--
*Gotens: Oh, right, right.
After 3 weeks of surfing the ion storm, we'll finally be leaving it in
an hour. When we finally return to the vastness of space, we'll be rondezvousing
with the Lou-Tzu, a klingon flag ship. Captain Sergio is promised to be
on it to pick up the Changeling Shane. Shane is going to be so happy when
he hears the good news!
(On the Pheonix-X, in the
Gym)
Shane: What's this?
Ensign Dan(hands him a book):
It's the good news, a new Bajoran Bible--
Shane: Get this away from
me! You're relieved!
(Ensign Dan walks away.
Captain Daniel enters the room)
Daniel(singing): "Hit me
baby one more time..." Hey guy. Your mentor is almost here. So I'll see
you when I see you.
Shane: Sergio? I'm having
fun here, I don't wanna go back.
(Later, on the Bridge)
*Sergio(on screen): What!?!?!!
Shane: I asked, how is your
hearing lately?
*Sergio(fixes his hearing
aid): Fine, fine.
Daniel: Hi, I'm the Captain--
*Sergio: No one cares who
you are!!
Shane: Captain, this is
my new friend, Captain Daniel. He's a changeling too. And you know how
hard Changelings come by these days.
Ensign Dan: Actually, they
come squishy and jellowe.
Gotens: Shut up, you're
relieved. We've just left the ion storm and we're ready to transport Shane.
Shane: I don't want to go
back. I'm staying.
*Sergio: You're staying!?
Why!? I've been your father since we found you afloat, for fifteen years
already!
Daniel: He's a Changeling,
he's old enough to make his own descisions.
*Sergio: I can't have it!
You're my son, and I love you.
*Mesach: Uhh, sir? You are
a Klingon.
*Sergio: Oh yeah. I mean--You're
my son, and I'll kill you if you don't come back.
Ensign Dan: Are you guys
finished yet? I wanna press the transport button.
Shane: But father--
Ensign Dan: Can I be un-relieved?
Daniel: Captain, if you
could listen to our side--
(The turbolift doors swoosh
open)
Jineen(enters the bridge):
Hey.
Gotens: Hey baby.
Daniel: Commander, this
is not the time. I'm helping a friend.
Jineen: I just came to say
that I'm hooking up with Lieutenant GoyCho instead of you.
Gotens: What!? The Bolian!?
Jineen: Yeah, I was going
to
go with the fat yellow guy from sector 7-G, but he keeps saying something
about dough.
Shane: I'm staying, and
that's that!!
*Sergio: I am your father!!
Shane: Not my biological
father! You're a klingon!
Ensign Dan: If you want
to transport, I'm gonna need to be put back on duty.
(Jineen heads for the doors)
Gotens: Baby, baby, where
you goin'?
*Sergio: Arrghh.
Daniel: Captain, calm down.
(Everyone starts arguing
simultaneously)
Daniel: ...If there was
only a way to resolve these problems...
(On Holodeck 3...)
Jerry Springzer: Hello,
and welcome to the Jerry Springzer show. Today we have 7 guests. Say hello
to Sergio, Daniel, Shane, Gotens, Jineen, GoyCho and Ensign Dan.
(The 7 guests say hello)
Jerry Springzer: I wasn't
talking to you.
(The 7 guests say, "oh")
Jerry Springzer: Now Shane,
why won't you tell us about your problem.
Shane: Well, Jerry, I've
become good friends with the Daniel Changeling and the Pheonix-X crew,
and since my ship is destroyed, I want to stay here. But my father doesn't
think so.
Jerry Springzer: What? That's
more of an Ophar Winfro show.
TheCrowd: Boooooo!! Hiiss!! Booo!!
Sergio: That's all because
of this Changeling, Daniel's brainwashing! You stupid--@$^%$#&%#@*!!!
Daniel: Hey, it's not my
fault you're a #%^%#&*@!$%^(*){!!!
(Sergio and Daniel get up
and fight. The guards break them apart)
TheCrowd: Jerry! Jerry!
Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
Jerry Springzer: Alright,
alright. Let's visit the Commander.
Gotens: Well, Jerry, Jineen's
been cheating on me with another alien.
Jineen(glances at him):
I'm sorry, tough luck.
GoyCho: Yeah, so you can
just $%$#^*$@@^*(*%!!!
Gotens: #%@!%^$&%*$#!!!
(GoyCho and Gotens get up
and fight until the guards break them up)
TheCrowd: Jerry! Jerry!
Jerry! Jerry!
GoyCho(turns to the girl):
Jineen, I'm sorry, but I've been sleeping with BOBELENE.
Jineen: What!?
BOB(in the crowd, he stands):
What!?
TheCrowd: Woooo!!!! Jerry!
Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
(BOBELENE walks out and
Jineen attacks her. The guards break them apart)
Jerry Springzer: Calm down,
calm down. Now, Ensign Dan why won't you tell us why you're here.
Ensign Dan(relaxes in his
chair): Well, Jerry--
Jerry Springzer: You may
call me Mr. Springzer.
Ensign Dan: What!? But everyone
else got to call you--
Jerry Springzer: #@%&^%$*@#!!
Ensign Dan: Okay, okay.
Jeez, you'd think we'd get into a fight or something.
(The guards come up, beat
up Ensign Dan, and return to their posts)
Ensign Dan: Ugh...well,
my problem is, everyone's been relieving me--
Gotens: What? That's your
poor excuse for a problem? You're relieved.
Ensign Dan: Argh! This is
the fourth time this episode.
Shane: Hello? What about
my problem? I want to stay on the ship.
(Meanwhile, on the bridge
of the Pheonix-X...)
Tong: It's a quarter the
size of our ship!
Armond: What is it?
Tong: A large, I'd say biological,
but I don't read any internal organs, space creatre. Actually, it looks
like a fish. Awww, so cute.
Armond: On scre--
Tong: It's gone. But now
I'm detecting something crawling on the hull of the klingon ship.
(Tong continues to read
sensors)
Tong: It's gone too.
(On the Bridge of the Lou-Tzu)
Commander Covek: Ha! Ha!
So the patok says to me, he says--
(A large amount of goo pours
onto the floor, from an air vent, right in front of the Commander. The
liquid shapeshifts into a humaniod figure)
Covek: By the Changelings...it's
a Changeling.
(The Changeling stands 7"10.
He walks forward, hits his head on a pipe, as he approaches Covek)
TheChangeling: I have come
for the one called Sergio. He must return to the link.
Helmsmen Mesach(grabs a
weapon): You're not getting your filthy hands on him without going through
me!!
TheChangeling(shapeshifts
his arm into a large spike and stabs Mesach): As you wish.
Mesach(colapses to the floor): ....Uuuuhhh...
(The Changeling leaps into
the air duct)
Covek(turns to his friend):
Anyways. So the patok says to me, he says...
(On the Pheonix-X, in Holodeck
3)
Shane: What will it be?
Sergio(pauses): ...I guess
I will need to think it over.
Ensign Dan: Uhhh, what about
my problem? Who's more important here?
Jerry Springzer: Yeah, yeah,
cry, cry. We'll be back after these messages with the conclusion of this
episode.
(On the Lou-Tzu; in the air
duct)
(The Changeling changes
into a spider and crawls through the duct. It later appears in the back
of a Klingon that is accessing a computer console. It shifts into Xena
and screams her scream.)
Changeling Xena: This is
for Gabriel!
Klingon: What?
(The Klingon turns around
surprised and confused. Xena takes her sword and stabs the Klingon with
it. Xena then accesses the computer console.)
Changeling Xena: Well well
well, it seems that the changeling is on another ship. Hmmm...
(The Changeling reads on
about what has happened through the logs.)
(On Holodeck 3 in the Phoenix-X)
Jerry: Now we are back.
If you are now joining us, we are with seven guests who all seem to have
problems.
(Jerry looks at Shane)
Jerry: So Shane, why do
you really want to stay on the Phoenix-X?
Shane: I told you why. Besides,
I feel that I belong here. I have friends and a fellow Changeling.
(Shane looks to Sergio)
Shane: And you are my friend
father. But you need to realize that I'm a individual and I can't always
stay with you. There will be that time where you need to let me go. And
this is the time.
Sergio (looks at his son,
and to the ground thinking): Well son, I guess there is only one way. The
Klingon way.
Jerry: Well, we will go
continue the rest of the show right after this.
Crowd: Claps.
(Meanwhile on the Lao-Tzu)
Changeling Xena: Computer
respond.
(Computer doesn't respond.
She tries again but fails. She manipulates her voice to the Klingon she
killed.)
Changeling Xena: Computer
respond.
Computer: <<computer
acknowledgement sound>>
Changeling Xena: Site to
Site transport to the Phoenix-X.
(She gets transported to
the Phoenix-X)
(On the Phoenix-X; Holodeck
3)
Jerry: Thank you for joining
us again. Let's get back to this.
Sergio: Yeah! Like i said,
we will do this the Klingon way. If you want your freedom, you fight me
for it.
Shane: But father, I can't
do that.
Sergio: You must!
Crowd: Jerry Jerry Jerry!
Shane: Okay then.
(They get up and get in
fighting position in front of everyone)
Sergio: We need weapons.
Computer, Battlith.
(A Battlith appears in his
hands.)
Shane: I'm sorry father.
(Sergio yells and charges
to Shane. Shane shifts into a opendoorway. Sergio goes through. Shane shifts
back into solid. Sergio turns around and takes his blade and throws it
at Shane, it stabs him, but he reflects it back and misses. Then Sergio
charges back. Shane shifts into a whip and trips Sergio.
Sergio is on the ground
and Shane splashes himself on Sergio and shifts into serpent around Sergio,
squeezing him with the face of his solid form looking Sergio straight in
the eyes.)
Shane: I won.
Sergio: I guess you have.
Goodbye son.
(Shane lets go and shifts
back into solid form)
Daniel: Whoa, that was something.
Gotens: The crowd is quiet.
Like they haven't seen a shapeshifter.
Sergio: Lao-Tzu, Sergio
here. Let's go. I will see you in due time son.
Shane: Bye.
(Jerry comes down the stage
clapping)
Jerry: Bravo Bravo. I knew
you had it in you.....Shane is it?
(Everyone looks at Jerry)
Shane: Yes.
Jerry: Looks like the whole
family is here.
Daniel: What do you mean?
(Jerry shifts into the mysterious
changeling)
Crowd: Huh!
Daniel: You are a changeling
too!
Shane: What he said.
Daniel: Computer, end program.
(Program ends)
(On the Pheonix-X. Sergio,
Shane, Daniel, Gotens, Ensign Dan, and a couple other crew members stand
there looking at the tall changeling)
Engisn Dan: Whoa, another
changeling! That is so cool.... Kill it!! Kill it!!
(All the other extra crew
members take out thier phasers and aim it at the unknown Changeling)
Daniel: Wait! Who are you?
TheChangeling: I am the
link......and I have come for you....
(He points at Shane)
Shane: Me?
TheChangeling: No, him.
(Sergio is standing behind
Shane)
Sergio: Well, it looks like
I will be leaving now....heh, heh... Sergio to Lau-Tzu, what is taking
you so long? Beam me through!
(The klingon, Sergio, begins
to beam out, but suddenly the unknown Changeling shoots out a long liquid
arm and hits Sergio in the shoulder. Sergio's shoulder begins to liquify....then
his arm...)
*Covek: Uhhhh, sir, I cannot
get a proper lock on you......
Ensign Dan(points at Sergio):
Ahhh!!! Another Changeling! Kill it!! Kill it!!
Daniel: Sergio, you're a
Changeling too?
(Sergio steps back to release
himself from the unknown changeling's grasp. The unkown changeling brings
his liquid arm back.)
Sergio(lowers his head down):
Ayyye, I am.
Gotens: But, then why do
you wear a defective hearing aid?
Sergio(looks up): I'm sorry,
what did you say?
Gotens: Nevermind.
Ensign Dan(walks up to the
unknown changeling): If you're taking Sergio back to the link, then why
don't you take Captian Daniel with you?
TheChangeling(shrugs): Eh,
he doesn't have the proper membership card.
Daniel: What!? I can go
back to the link whenever I want. But right now, they have a changeling
desease.... Wait--shouldn't you have the disease too?
TheChangeling(loses patience):
What are you talking about?!
(The tall Changeling turns
to Sergio)
TheChangeling: Link with
us, now!!
Sergio(hides behind Daniel):
No, go away!
(TheChangeling shoots out
his liquid arm again, and accidentally hits Daniel)
Daniel(pushes the arm out):
Owe, don't do that!
Sergio: You see, Captian
Daniel--
(Sergio runs behind Shane
again. The changeling shoots his arm and accidentally hits Shane)
Shane(pushes the arm out):
Stop it!
Sergio(hides behind Gotens):
--I was departed by the link--//font>
Gotens(jumps out of the
way): Whoa, whoa, let's not get too hastey.
Daniel(crosses his arms):
Yeah, yeah, and now they want you back....just like Odo. Old story, different
episode.
TheChangeling/Sergio/Shane:
Who's Odo?
Gotens: Oh my gosh, don't
you guys watch Deep Space 9?
TheChangeling: Sergio! If
you do not come, I will kill you!
Daniel: A changeling has
never harmed another changeling.
TheChangeling: But it can
be done. How about this? If you do not rejoin the link, then I will kill
every solid in this room!!
Ensign Dan: Gulp.
(The tall changeling looks
around at the other people in the holodeck....Goycho ...Jineen ....Gotens
.....BOB .....BOBELENE ....Ensign Dan....)
TheChangeling: Eeuuu, a
naked female Ferengi.
BOBELENE: Harumph!
Daniel: Lieutenants, set
your phasers on stun and fire at him!
(They fire at the changeling.
There's no effect)
Daniel: --What? Those phasers
are strong enough to even knock me out. Set to vapourize.
(Still no effect on the
tall changeling. A blob of gew spits out of the tall changeling, onto the
floor. Another blob of gew spits out from the other side of the changeling,
onto the floor. Five more blobs of gew spit out. The seven extra blobs
of gew transform into seperate Changelings.)
Ensgin Dan: Aaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!!!!
More changelings!!! Kill them!! Kill them!!
(A Changeling apprehends
GoyCho. Another changeling apprehends Jineen; another one grabs BOB; one
grabs BOBELENE; one gets Ensign Dan; and one apprehends Gotens)
TheTallChangeling: All I
have to do is give the command.
Daniel: Wait a minute....
you all travel in one body?
Shane: Gotta admit, it saves
space.
Sergio: Hah! Do I care about
these people?
TheTallChangeling: If you
do not return to the link, then I will be forced to take one of these young
changelings for where I have no idea they came from.
(Daniel and Shane look at eachother, clueless)
Sergio(glances at Shane):
Alright! Alright! I will return. I have been gone for a couple centuries
anyway.
(Sergio finally liquifies
and goes into the tall Changeling.)
Gotens: That's gotta be
bad for higene in some way.
(The other seven changelings
also liquify and return to the one tall changeling. Daniel and Shane glance
at eachother)
TheChangeling: We apologize
for any inconvenience.
Ensign Dan: Don't worry
about it, we all make death threats at least once in our life times.
Gotens(shrugs): I do it
at least nineteen times a life time.
TheChangeling: I wasn't
talking to you solids!!
Ensign Dan/Gotens: Oh.
TheChangeling(looks back
at Shane and Daniel): We do not know where you two come from, and we do
not wish to have you join the link. But we wish you two luck on your journey
through space.....who knows, maybe you both will end up being gay, or soul
mates, just like Xena and Gabrielle.... we love that show.
Daniel: So you are your
own link...
Shane: I guess there's more
link's out there.
(TheChangeling turns around
and heads for the doors)
TheChangeling: Good luck,
Shane.
(The tall changeling-link goes into the wall. The changeling emerges outside the Pheonix-X on the hull. It detaches and shapeshifts into a space creature and flies away. The klingon ship also departs. The Pheonix-X accelerates into a transwarp conduit)
Ensgin Dan(lying down on
a bed): And that's the whole story, Councillor. I swear if I see another
Changeling, I'm gonna relieve myself of duty...!!
THE END
(Ensign Dan and Councillor
Lucricia sit in the Councilling room)
Lucricia: Well, Ensign Dan,
it seems you have acute changelingvitus.
Ensign Dan(sits up): Is
it bad?
Lucricia: Yes.
Ensign Dan: Well what should
I do?
Lucricia: Well, from now
on, when ever you see a changeling, you must cluck like a chicken.
Ensign Dan: ---What?
Lucricia: Cluck like a chicken.
You know, boc, boc, boc, boooocccc!!
Ensign Dan: ...
Lucricia(breaks seriousness): Aaaaahhhahahahahahahaa!!!
(Lucricia liquifies and
reshapeshifts into Shane)
Shane: Aaaaaahahahahahaa!!!!
You solids are so funny!!
Ensign Dan: ...Grrr...
Shane(stands up): Hahahaha!!
Computer, end program.
(The room turns into the
empty holodeck)
Shane(walks out the doors):
Ha! Ha! I love these holodecks!
Ensign Dan: Oh my gosh,
how did I get here? ...Arrgghh....!!! I have a scary feeling about this
new Shane guy...