"The Bajoran Trove"
"The Bajoran Trove"
*Daniel: Captains Log. I'm a little nervous of this meeting, I hope nothing goes wrong, since I will be the Commander of six other ships. Nevertheless, I can do it. Starfleet Headquarters has asked that the First in Command of all seven ships accompany the Captains so they may get to know who they're working with if there is an absence of the Captain during an abnormal situation.
(On the Pheonix-X)
(In the MessHall)
Ensign Dan: Here Night,
try this drink.
Gotens:
Okay.
(Night smells it first and
then takes a drink)
Gotens:
It's good.
Ensign Dan: It's the Bajoran
Trove. It's supposed to inspire your emotions. The chemicals mixed in it
do all the work, it's like a medicine.
Gotens:
Really?
Ensign Dan: Sure if you
inhaled it, well in Bajorans anyway. I dunno how it'd work in a Trill or
a Human.
*Daniel:
Daniel to Ensign Dan, may I see you in my Ready Room?
Ensign Dan: Ey' Captian.
Gotens:
Well I gotta go over these profiles anyway.
(On Floratarios III)
(Outside the White House
of Commons)
(Two unkown Humaniod Aliens
talk)
Mellinook: Okay, do you
have the phaser rifle?
Pablokinya: Yes, in this
bag. We're going to kill all those Federation people aren't we?
Mellinook: Okay, okay. I'll
tell you, we go in through this heating vent, and crash the party when
they go into the Refreshments Room. We are not to kill, all we have to
do is kidnap the President or Prme Minister...
(On the Pheonix-X)
(In the MessHall)
(BOB comes over)
BOB: Big meeting, eh?
Gotens:
Hey, first impressions are everything. Sit down.
(BOB takes a seat)(Gotens
reads an electronic pad)
BOB: What are you reading?
Gotens:
These are the profiles of the Captians and ships in our fleet.
BOB: Any good ships?
Gotens:
Yu...ugh...yup.
BOB: Are you alright?
Gotens:
Yeah. Take the U.S.S. Hijinx. Betazoid Captian, she dragged a Maquis ship
through the Badlands. The Maquis ship was damaged badly, she found a way
to distill the Maquis' shields and beam everybody on board. All that without
getting the two ships destroyed from the storms. They even almost had a
nearby collision the U.S.S. Voyager.
BOB: Wow, that's amazing.
Gotens:
Of course it is. I remember a time...in my second host, Elena...I wasn't
part of the Federation then, I rode around the galaxy in this Trill Freighter.
I carried goods to Palona Prime for 3 Bars of Latinum an hour. I had a
nearby collision...
(In the Ready Room)
Daniel:
You're Bajoran, you have good observation skills, right?
Ensign Dan: Is this about
the pig in the Transporter Room? Because I swear that I thought that there
were no holographic emiters in there.
Daniel:
No, I need my Information Officer to accompany me to the meeting to take
notes on peoples attitudes,
Ensign Dan: Why?
Daniel:
I need to know how far I can trust my fleet during a tough situation.
Ensign Dan: How can I do
that if there won't be a tough situation down there? And isn't that the
reason the Commander is going with you?
Daniel:
Yes, but I need more than just the two of us. Understood?
Ensign Dan: But say--
Daniel:
Just pretend that you understand!
Ensign Dan: Okay okay. I'll
observe.
Daniel:
Good, read over these profiles.
(Daniel hands over an electronic
pad)
(In the Messhall)
(BOB takes a sip of his
drink)
(Gotens reads the pad)
Gotens:
You know, I've been on the U.S.S. Jenova before.
BOB: Mhm...
Gotens:
I remember a time when I got into a little fight with Captian Iviok. This
was in my last host, Rivera. Uh, the Captian's Andorian. And Andorians
are such hard people to get along with. They have no sense of humor. Well,
I was on the Bridge taking readings from a probe I created...
(BOB gets up and leaves)
Gotens:
And when we sent out the probe, it made this blue smoke trail. It looked
really nice. I told Captian Iviok that it looked nice. He disagreed. I
asked him, how can you not like the texture of that blue smoke. He himself
was blue...
(In Transporter Room 3)
(The Captian stands in the
transporter circle)
(Ensign Dan enters)
Daniel:
Where's Commander Gotens?
Ensign Dan: I dunno, it's
your job to control your crew.
(On the Bridge)
(President Creton is on
Screen)
*Creton: I know that Mellinook
is plotting some way to get back at me.
Armond: Aaand this Mellinook
is the leader of the underground rebellion?
*Creton: Yeah. Anyways,
if you could keeps sensors on the building. Please?
Armond: Yeah, okay.
*Creton: Where is the Captian?
(Armond sighs)
(In Transporter Room 3)
*Armond: Captian, the President
is asking where you are.
(Captian Daniel goes to
tap his communicator)
Billy: Uh, Captian, are
you ready to beam down.
Daniel: Okay, fine. Ensign
Billy, find the Commander and tell him to get down there. Gosh I'm nervous.
(Daniel and Ensign Dan are
beamed away)
(In the Messhall)
(Heelix takes a seat at
the table with Commander Gotens)
Gotens:
And you know, he gave me this weird look. I dunno if it's some significant
look from Andorians, or if he was having indigestion. So I said...
(On Floratarios III)
(In the White House of Commons)(In
a conference room)
(12 people sit at the big
table, 6 Captians and thier First Officers)(Prime Minister Clingten and
President Creton greet everyone)
Creton: Thanks for coming.
(Captian Daniel and Ensign
Dan walk in)
Daniel:
My apologies.
(Ensign Dan takes a seat)
Clingten: It's perfectly
understandable Captian.
(Clingten and Creton take
a seat)(Daniel stands at the head of the table)
Clington: First of all,
I'd like to thank you all for helping us during this tough time in the
Floratarios Sector.
(Daniel nods)
Daniel:
Well, it's nice to see my fleet.
(Ensign Dan taps on the
electronic pad, the pad makes beeping noises)
Daniel:
Uh...Ensign, what are you doing?
Ensign Dan: I'm taking note
on your lateness.
(Daniel trying not to say
anything to Dan continues)
Daniel:
...Let me introduce myself, I am Captian Daniel X of the Federation Starship
Pheonix-X. And yes I am a Changeling. And you are all under my command,
since I have been chosen by Starfleet Command. I hope we all get along,
and be...be friends...
(Ensign Dan continues to
tap on his pad)
Daniel:
...Um...The Flortarios Sector boarders a Romulan space and Dominion territory
to the Federation. It's small, but every place needs to be protected. Now--
(Ensign Dan taps the pad)
Daniel:
Now...
(Ensign Dan continues to
make the beeping noises)
Daniel:
WOULD YOU PLEASE PUT THE PAD AWAY!!!
(Pause)
Ensign Dan: ....Ye--Y--Yes--Yes
sir.
(Everyone is startled and
look at eachother)
Daniel:
Heh-heh...um...I'd like now to introduce ourselves to each other. If the
Commanders don't mind, I'll introduce the Captians only.
(Everyone still keep talking)
Daniel:
QUIET!!
(Everyone shuts up)
Daniel:
Thank you.
(Daniel reads of a pad)
Daniel:
Introducing Captian Harley Menrow, of the U.S.S. Crucial. He's human and
likes to take long walks on the beach. Captian Aries Wasyati, of the U.S.S.
Ixion. He hates annoying Ensigns.
(Ensign Dan looks over to
Captian Wasyati)(Wasyati gives an ugly look to Ensign Dan)
Daniel:
Captian Micheal McCary, of the U.S.S. Tsunami. He's threequarters Human
and onequarter Klingon and likes to sing. Captian Iviok, of the U.S.S.
Jenova...Well it doesn't say anything about you here.
(Captian Iviok grunts)
Daniel:
And that says it all. Captian Yuffie Samya, of the U.S.S. Dropzone. She's
human and likes to walk around her ship in her--oh my gosh!
(Captian Samya winks at
Daniel)
Daniel:
Uhh...Commander Andrea Reynolds, of the U.S.S. Hijinx. Betazoid, and she
likes sports. Now I'd like to go over strategic positions...
(On the Pheonix-X)
(In the Messhall)
Gotens:
So I said to the blue guy, you want to go warp? Destablelize the second
generator!!
(Kayl and Gotens laugh)
(On Flortarios III)
(In the White House of Commons)(In
the Conference Room)
(Daniel explains the position
of the Ixion)(He hears snoring)(Daniel turns around and sees Ensign Dan
sleeping with his head down on the table)
Daniel:
Um--Dan.
Ensign Dan: <<ZZzz>>
Daniel:
Ensign.
Ensign Dan: <<ZZzzz>>
(Daniel embarrassedly walks
over to Ensign Dan)(He shakes the Ensign's shoulder)
Daniel:
Ensign!!
(Ensign Dan pulls his head
up)
Ensign Dan: Huh?
Menrow: Pay attention Ensign.
Ensign: Yes sir.
(On the Pheonix-X)
(In the MessHall)
Ensign Billy: Thar yar.
Gotens:
And then the creature tried to bite at me--oh hey Ensign.
Billy: Th' Captian told
me t'tell you t'get down to the planet, you're late for the meet'n.
Gotens:
Hey, you know your hair style reminds me of a young officer I met while
posted on Flortarios III. In my last host, I was posted down on the planet
during the---
Billy: Sir?
Gotens:
During the quarrels. Well, there we were under attack...
(On Flortarios III)
(In the White House of Commons)(In
the Conference Room)
Daniel:
Well now that the formal stuff is over. We can now make our way into the
refreshments room.
(Everyone gets up and heads
out the other door)(Daniel stays back)
Daniel:
Ensign, may I talk to you for a minute?
Ensign Dan: Yes Captian?
Daniel:
What are you doing!?
Ensign Dan: Well your tone
of voice is so boring--
Daniel:
You are embarrassing me. The other Captians aren't going to look at me
seriously now.
Ensign Dan: Don't worry
about it, I'll patch things up with them. Let's go in the refreshments
room.
(Ensign Dan leaves)
Daniel:
Huh? Wait. Arrgh.
(In the Refreshment Room)
McCary: Ah, Ensign. I've
been wanting to meet with you.
Ensign Dan: Captian.
McCary: Hi, Captian McCary,
of the Tsunami.
Ensign Dan: You know, my
Captian isn't really incompetant. He really is a serious Captian. Admitidally,
he has his faults, there was this one time when he almost...
(Over by Daniel and Commander
Jarell)(Daniel hears Ensign Dan)
Daniel:
Uh, can you excuse me for a minute?
Jarell: Of course.
(Daniel walks over to Ensign
Dan)
Daniel:
May I speak with you?
Ensign Dan: Sure.
(Captian McCary walks to
the snack table)
Daniel:
What are you doing now?!
Ensign Dan: I'm trying to
patch up your reputation.
Daniel:
I don't need you messing with my reputation. I want you to not get caught
up in a conversation, just observe them. Pleeease, do it, now!
Ensign Dan: Okay, okay.
(Ensign Dan walks around
the room)(Daniel continues speaking with Commander Jarell)
(On the Pheonix-X)
(On Deck 34)
(Billy and Gotens walk to
the Transporter Room)
Gotens:
I said to him, the left way is the hardest way. But he still didn't believe
me.
Billy: Uh, the Transporter
Room is this way Commander.
Gotens:
Oh yeah. Then when he aproached me...
(In Transporter Room 2)
(Billy pushes Commander Gotens into the right spot on the transporter)
Commander:
But then I got fed up, I phasered the rock...
(Billy transports the Commander)
(On Flortarios III)
(In the White House of Commons)(In
the Refreshments Room)
(Commander Gotens beams
in)
Gotens:
The rock didn't explode! It just got bigger! So what we did was--
Daniel: Night, so good of you to make it.
Gotens:
Yeah, but you don't understand the colour of the rock. It emitted a wiered...
Daniel:
What are you talking about?
(Captian Daniel notices
Commander Melyot approaching Ensign Dan)
Daniel:
Oh no. Ensign Dan is going to make me look like a fool if he talks with
him, especially if he's a Klingon!
(Daniel walks over to Melyot)
Gotens:
I babysitted a Klingon before, this was in my 3rd host, Laumar. I was on...
(On the other side of the
room)
Samya: You know, that Pheonix-X
crew acts really weird. We're under thier command?
McCary: It seems so. Who
is that man over there, chatting away so much?
(With Daniel)
Daniel:
Um...Commander.
(Melyot turns around)
Melyot: Ah, Captian Daniel.
Daniel:
You know, I have my own Klingon Exchange Officer on my bridge too.
Melyot: Is that so?...
(With Gotens)
Gotens:
The little guy bit me! I thought I was going to die of a disease. But nevertheless--
Reynolds: Are you alright?
Your thoughts seem to be coming at an incredible rate.
Gotens:
You know, you're right. I never thought of what the little kid could of
been thinking. But then again, it was a Klingon child. He only thinks of--
Reynolds: Commander--
(Daniel notices Commander
Morris approaching Ensign Dan)
Daniel:
Um--excuse me.
Melyot: But--
(Daniel approaches Morris)
Daniel:
Ah--Commander, of the...Tsunami?
(Ensign Dan gets into a
conversation with Lieutenant Commander Esreck)
Ensign Dan: Oh yeah, the
Captian does it all the time.
(Another place in the room)
Creton: I've never really
met Captian Daniel. Now I'm glad I haven't. He's going around the whole
room like a nervous little nymph.
Menrow: What have we got
our selves into.
(With Gotens)
Renolds: Help! Somebody.
This man needs medical attention.
Gotens:
Ugh... And I said to her, you know, you make me sick. She responded with
a mad rage!
(Everyone walks over)
Daniel: Night? Commander? Are you alright?
Gotens:
But why? All I did was speak my mind that time. I guess I did expect the phaser...
Ensign Dan: Make way, lemme
through. Commander Gotens, are you alright?
Gotens:
But then again, I could've just used those gymnastic skills I practiced
all that life.
McCary: What's wrong with
him?
Daniel:
Oh no...Ensign, this is an emergency situation, please get out of the way.
(Other side of room)
Creton: Just what we need,
the Pheonix-X crew coming to the rescue...
(With the crowd)
Ensign Dan: I think I know
the problem. Somebody get me some of that fruit over there.
Daniel:
What are you doing?
Gotens:
So I pressed the button, and we lifted off. It was great!
Ensign Dan: I think I can
reverse the effects of that Bajoran Trove. Somebody get me the wine too.
Gotens:
We even almost ran into the mountian. That was close.
(Ensign Dan collects more
stuff)(He takes off his communicator)(He mixes the ingredients together)
Daniel: Night! Calm down! Hello??
Renolds: He's off on another
track of mind. He doesn't notice that he's even here.
(Ensign Dan sends an electric
shock through the liquid mixture from the communicator)
Ensign Dan: Here, drink
this.
(Ensign Dan holds it up
to Gotens's lips)(Gotens takes a sip and continues talking)
Gotens:
...And when we...umm...
Daniel: Night?
Gotens:
What was I saying? Where am I? What's going on?
Daniel:
You're in the White House of Commons.
Gotens:
How'd...? Did I miss the meeting?
Daniel:
He's alright everybody!
(Everybody applauses)
Samya: Good work Ensign.
Menrow: Excellent job Ensign.
(They shake Ensign Dan's
hand)
McCary: I was wrong about
you Daniel, you've got a great crew.
Daniel:
Uh...thanks...I think.
Gotens:
What?
Renolds: You're confused,
sit down for a second, we'll explain the whole thing to you.
Creton: You know, that Pheonix-X
crew isn't really that bad.
(Iviok nods)
Daniel:
I guess you're not that much of a nusance Ensign.
Ensign Dan: Thanks. And
you're not that much of a good Captian.
Daniel:
Hey. You're relieved.
(Minutes later...)
(Suddenly Mellinook breaks
out of the heating vent and holds the phaser rifle to the crowd)
Mellinook: Go, to that corner.
(Pablokinya breaks out of
the vent with another rifle)
Pablokinya: Where's the
President?
Mellinook: It's the one
without the Federation uniform you idiot.
Pablokinya: Oh yeah.
(Captain Daniel shapeshifts
into an exact figure of the President)
Pablokinya: There he is.
Got him.
Daniel: Uhh....I'm afraid you have the wrong person.
Mellinook: Huh? There's
two of them?
Daniel:
No, there is only one.
Pablokinya: Let's grab both
of them.
Mellinook: No. There is
no need. We'll just take the Prime Minister. Grab him!
(Daniel slips behind the
crowd and changes into the Prime Minister)
Daniel:
Here I am.
Prime Minister: Yeah, there
he is.
Pablokinya: Uhh...hello...what
the H-E- double hockey sticks is going on here?
Ensign Dan: What a wimp!
Just say it. Hell!
Captain Iviok: Yeah! I think
I'm starting to like you Ensign.
Mellinook: Shutup.
(Iviok grunts)
(Ensign Dan gives a squeak
trying to prove his manliness to Iviok)
Pablokinya: Anyways....
Iviok(gayly): Anyways...
(The crowd laughs)
Pablokinya: Stop laughing
at me!
(He shoots the roof)
(Everyone gets quiet)
Mellinook: Everyone shutup.
Do I need to remind you that this is a kidnap. We still have to figure
out who is the real leader.
*Armond: Captain, we've
discovered that there were phazers fired down there. Is everything okay?
Daniel:
Not now Lieutenant.
Pablokinya: Aha! He is not
the real Prime minister.
(Pablokinya shoots Captain
Daniel)
Mellinook: Take the Prime
Minister.
Pablokinya: Got him.
Mellinook: Let's make one
thing clear. You interfere with the Dominion and you pay.
(Mellinook activate his
Transporter and beams out)
(Captain Daniel shapeshifts
back into himself from a pool of polymorphic liquid. He immediately contacts
his ship to locate the recent beam out and have short range sweeps of the
planet and everything leaving it.)
Daniel:
They couldn't have gone far. Dominion technology is limited in the field
of transport. I want everyone to get back to their ships. Keep orbit around
Floritarios III until I get back to my ship with new orders.
President: What happens
to the Prime Minister?
Daniel:
We will take care of it. For the moment, you need to be guarded. I want
you to remain in your quarters for now. Have your men posted everywhere.
We cannot afford to have you gone too.
President: Understood.
Gotens:
We need to get back to the ship.
(They all beam back to the Pheonix-X)
(On the Pheonix-X)(Bridge)
Daniel: Armond, report.
Armond: We've got a recent
transport with a Dominion signature.
Daniel:
To where?
Armond(taps his console):
It's to...It's a Dominion Battle Cruiser!
Daniel:
What?!? How many are there?
Armond: One.
(Meanwhile on the USS Dropzone)
Ensign: Captain, we have
Captain Daniel's discoveries. All the other ships have been briefed.
Samya: And so?
Ensign: Well, there is a
message directed only to the Dropzone to you.
Samya: Let's hear it.
*Mellinook: So, Captain
Samya. I've noticed that you are the most attractive officer in the Federation.
All the more to send you this message. I want you to inform your shapeshifting
flag leader that he is to expect a fleet of about 20 ships on an intercept
course to the Floritarios Sector at this very moment. That will teach you
guys to never mess the Dominion. Let's just say that it is a sort of payback
for the destruction of our mining operation, mostly responsible for your
Sisko. I would most likely hate to terminate you, lovely, but all in love
and war.
Ensign: That's the end of
the transmission.
Samya: Uhhhh!! I'm going
to enjoy kicking his Gludious Maximus! Inform the
rest of the fleet of this
message.
(On the Pheonix-X)
Walace: Thank you for the
information Dropzone. Pheonix-X out. Captain, what do we do now?
Daniel:
Well, open a channel to all the Fleet.
Walace: Open.
Daniel:
This is Captain Daniel of the Pheonix-X. I'm sure everyone knows what has
transgressed. There is a fleet of 20 battle ships heading our way. We are
only a fleet of 7. Well, 10 if we are in Tactical mode. But that's a different
story. My orders are to lead them to the binary stars in this system. We
will
battle them there. From
what I know to Dominion technology, their ships are susceptible to gravimetric
disturbances. I want the USS Jeneva, on the other hand, to remain here
in orbit of Floritarios III to defend it. Protect the President at all
extent. Don't let that battle cruiser leave the planet. Once we finish
with the oncoming fleet, we will retrieve the Prime Minister. Pheonix-X
out.
(Meanwhile on the USS Hijinx)
Ensign: Commander, there
are-
Reynolds: I know. I can
read your mind. The fleet is entering the
system............WHAT?!?
Oh no. Inform the rest of the fleet. Red Alert.
(Half way out in the Flortarios
System)
(On the Pheonix-X)
(In the Turbolift)
Commander Gotens: You know, I'd really like to see the Government make
peace with the Underground Community Leaders.
Captian
Daniel: Oh yeah? Well it is external affairs anyways, we can't
interfere. Did you know that Jem'Hadar Ships are weak to Gravametrical
Disturbances?
Gotens:
No, I did not know that...interesting...
(They arrive at the Bridge)
Daniel(peers
into the view screen): Report.
Lieutenant Commander Armond:
A fleet of 20 Dominion Ships are intruding into the system.
Gotens:
Think of it as a test for our fleet.
Ensign Dan(drinks a glass
of Bajoran Trove): Noooo, think of it as our death wish.
Daniel:
You are out of order Ensign.
Ensign Dan: At least my
body parts can stay in order.
Daniel:
Yeah but wit' your woman you can't get nowhere wit' 'em.
Ensign Dan: 'Least I can't
create my woman.
Daniel:
Do you wanna take this outside?
Ensign Dan: Yeah, I'll take
you on right now!!
Armond: Jem'Hadar Battle
Crusier decloaking.
(The Ensign and Captian
are beamed out)
(On the Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier)
(Bridge)(Ensign and Captian
are beamed into a forcefield)
Daniel: Com'on, let's go, or are those ridges on your nose cloging the air to your
brain?
Ensign Dan: Not as much
as yourrrr......where are we?
Meloneus: You are not Commander Gotens.
Ensign Dan: Duh.
Meloneus: I hold no grudges
against you two.
Daniel:
Who are you!? Waitaminute--you're that Gul....Meloneus.
Meloneus: That is precise,
and I am Gul Meloneus, Commander of the 24.5th Order.
Ensign Dan: Wow that's so
nice. Can I have your autograph now?
Daniel:
Listen, no one has a grudge against a member of my crew without having
a grudge against me!--With the exception of Ensign Dan.
Ensign Dan: Thanks Captian.
(On the Pheonix-X)
Gotens:
Can you beam them back?
Kayl: Negative, thier shields
are up.
Gotens:
That reminds me, put our shields up.
Armond: Commander, I'm not
reading the twenty ships anymore...They're gone.
Gotens:
They're cloaked.
BOB: They're suspectible
of Gravametrical Disturbances.
Armond: One just decloaked
in front of the Crucial. More are decloaking and cloaking again--the Hijinx
is being attacked at--the Tsunami is too--
Gotens:
Hail that ship.
BOB(raises arms and then
he bows): Hail the almighty--
Gotens:
BOB, if you're gonna do that, at least have the common curtousy to hail
me.
(The Dropzone and a Jem'Hadar ship float by, firing at eachother)
(On Meloneus' ship)
*Gotens:
Meloneus, it's you.
Meloneus: Yes. It is I,
Gul Meloneus, Commander of the 24.5th Order.
Ensign Dan: I'm so glad
we've established that.
*Gotens(teases): Meloneus...I know.
Meloneus: Know what?
*Gotens:
I know that your ship is weak to Gravametrical Disturbances.
Eighth: What!? Oh my Founder!! Aaahhhhh!!!
(The Eighth runs around
in circles)(The Fourth phasers him)
*Gotens:
Exchange me--
Meloneus: You know what,
I'm quite happy with what I got right now. I've got your Captian, and the
Prime Minister of Flortarios III, two very important people.
Ensign Dan: Hey, what about
me?
(On the Pheonix-X)(Bridge)
Gotens:
So that's what you're doing with a Jem'Hadar ship in the Alpha Quadrant...you're
going to take revenge on Starfleet and Flortarios III...I guess that makes
sense, but not as much sense as those Gravametrical Disturbances make.
*Meloneus: That is correct,
just as Melinook described. Years ago, when the Cardassians and Federation
were fighting over Flortarios III, an alien race interfered and pushed
both of us out. Now, we have one of the leaders of that alien race. I wanted
you, but I guess I'm going to have to settle for your Jello Captian.
(On Meloneus' Ship)
Ensign Dan: What? Do you
not see me? I'm right here! At least notice me if you're going to capture
me and put me in this stink'n force field. And then you start talk'n about
these Gravametrical--
Osh(the Vorta in command):
Meloneus!! What are you doing?
Meloneus: Taking home a
prize.
Ensign Dan: I'm flattered
you feel that way.
Daniel:
Ensign, why don't you have a phaser on you!?
Ensign Dan(turns around):
You banned them from me on the Bridge after I accidentally stunned a Vulcan
Embassidor. Why don't you shape shift one?
Daniel:
I can't it wouldn't have any phaser anti-matter.
Ensign Dan: Why don't you
use the Gravametrical Disturbances?
Daniel:
I need a phaser.
*Gotens:
Well I got one. Fire.
(Screen goes out)
Ensign Dan: Great, he's
going to kill us now.
(The Pheonix-X fires photon
torpedoes at Meloneus' ship)
(Another Jem'Hadar ship
attacks the Pheonix-X)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Gotens:
Armond, initiate Multi-Vector Attack Separation Mode. Alpha-3-4.
BOB: What about the Gravametrical
Disturbances?
Gotens:
That's gonna hafta wait.
(The Pheonix-X separates into three and attacks)(The top vector attacks Meloneus' Ship)(The bottom vector and middle vector attack the other ship)
(On Meloneus' Ship)
Meloneus: They know about...the
thing.
Osh: What thing?
Meloneus: The Gravametrical
Disturbances!!
Osh: Oh my Changeling. This
is the end for us all!!!
Meloneus: Well I wouldn't
go that far.
Daniel(turns
around and looks at a guard on the top section of the bridge): Hey! The
forcefield is gone!
Ensign Dan(turns around):
What? No it's not--
Daniel(right
hand starts turning to a long metal spike): Now it's your turn to die...
(The guard get scared and
fires torpedo rifle at the Captian and Ensign)
Ensign Dan: AAaaaaahhhhh!!!
(The shot takes out the
force field)
Daniel:
Thank you, for screaming in my ear.
Ensign Dan: Well can't you
shape shift some less repercussioned ear drums.
(The Captian's arms turn
into whips. He flings them around the necks of the two Jem'Hadar guards
and they fall to the ground)
Daniel:
I'll take that into consideration.
Meloneus(turns around):
What the--?
Daniel(punches
Meloneus in the face): How does that feel for Jello?
Osh(tackles the Ensign to
the floor): You little--
Ensign Dan(knees the Vorta
in the stomach): Are we being a brave Vorta today?
(Outter edge of the Flortarios
System)
(On the Tsunami)
(The Bridge is damaged and
messy)
Lieutenant Morris: Shields
down to 10%!!
Captian McCary: Send out
a destress signal!
*Computer: Warning,
hull stress at 75%.
(The Bridge shakes from
another torpedo shot)
(Three Jem'Hadar Battle Crusiers
fly around the ship firing torpedos)
(The Hijinx intercepts and
fires on two ships)
(On the Hijinx)
Lieutenant Andrea: Captian,
there's a Jem'Hadar ship on an intercept course with the Tsunami.
Commander Reynolds: Suicide?
Aim rapid quantum torpedo bursts at that one ship!!
Andrea: Okay, okay, you
don't have to yell.
(On the Tsunami)
McCary: Fire phasers at
it! Fire anything!
Ralph: Can I fire them?
McCary: No.
Ralph(wines): Aww...
(The Hijinx destroys the
Jem'Hadar ship)
(Another Jem'Hadar Battle
Ship heads for the Hijinx)
(On the Hijinx)
Reynolds: Move us outta
the way.
(The Hijinx moves to the left and the Jem'Hadar ship drives through the Hijinx's Warp Nacel)
(On the Hijinx)
Andrea: Warp drive offline.
Lieutenant Bo: I'm getting
casulties from decks 8 through 13.
*Scoootee: Caupteen, I jooost
caaaaaun't dooo it.
Reynolds: Who are you? Nevermind,
reroute power from the warpcore to the shields.
*Scoootee: ..Hoookay.
(The Crucial comes in and destroys the two Jem'Hadar ships firing at the Tsunami)
(On the Crucial)
Captian Menrow: Full phaser
spread.
(Half way in the Flortarios
System)
(The Pheonix-X returns to
one whole ship)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Gotens:
Captian?
*Daniel(shapeshifts
into Meloneus and taps on the control deck): I can't contact the other
ships.
Gotens:
Well what about the Gravametrical Disturbances?
(On Meloneus' Ship)
Daniel:
Ensign, what are you doing?
Ensign Dan(taps on the upper
control panel): I'm attempting to create a virus.
*Gotens:
On who's orders?!
Ensign Dan: Sir, with all
due respect...We're running outta time!!
Daniel(pauses
and turns around): On mine, Ensign, try creating an internal virus that
this ship can send out to all the other Jem'Hadar Battle Crusiers.
Ensign Dan: Aye sir.
*Gotens:
It sorta won't work if all thier shields are up.
Ensign Dan(continues taping
on the control deck): I was sort of hoping you guys could fix that for
me.
(A Jem'Hadar breaks through
the concealed door)(Daniel tackles him to the floor and starts punching
him
in the face)
Daniel(punces
him in the face): I got your Gravametric Disturbance right here!
(On the Pheonix-X)
Gotens:
Try to create a subspace package that will attract itself to a Jem'Hadar
ship.
Red: We would need the Jem'Hadar's
shield access codes.
Gotens:
Okay, Red, you get on that.
Red(taps combadge): Transporter
room five, one to beam over to the Jem'Hadar Battle Ship.
(Red transports there)
*Red: Where's Defense Control?
*Ensign Dan(brings his head
up): Well don't look at me.
BOB(steps up): It's the
third control deck to your left.
Armond: I can modify the
package so that as soon as the shields weaken from a phaser shot, it will
seep through.
*Daniel(shapeshifts
back): Do it.
(Orbiting Flortarios III)
(On the Jenova)
Lieutenant Gondi: Captian,
the Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier is still on the other side of the planet.
Captian Iviok: Take us around
and hail them.
Gondi: They are not responding.
Iviok: Hold status.
Gondi: They've cloaked sir.
Captian! A Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier behind us is decloaking!
Commander Melyot: Raise
shields! Fire torpedos! This is a good day to die!
Gondi: Is that last one
an order sir?
(On the nonactive cloaked
Battle Crusier in front of the Jenova)
Mellinook: Excellent.
Pablokinya: You betrayed
me! You said we were going to only kidnap a leader and talk rebellion.
I didn't know you were helping the Cardassians!
Mellinook: Listen, the little
war between your underground rebellion and the Flortarios III Government
doesn't concern me. Frankly, I hope the surface people crush your loser
underground community.
Pablokinya: Why you sorry
little Grav--
Mellinook: Guards, take
him away. Helm, set a course for Cardassia Prime....And watch out for our
Gravametrical Disturbances.
(Half way out in the System)
(On the Pheonix-X)
*Ensign Dan: Done, the Jem'Hadar
won't know what hit 'em.
Gotens:
Transporter Room 5, beam the three back to the bridge.
(The Captian, Lieutenant
Commander, and Ensign are beamed on the bridge)
Daniel:
What did you do?
Gotens:
Did it have anything to do with Gravametrical Disturbances?
Ensign Dan: No. The virus
will initiate the replicators in thier ship creating the Bajoran Trove.
The Bajoran Trove will then be rerouted through the ventalation system,
in a gaseous state. The Jem'Hadar and Vorta will inhale it and as you saw
what happened to Night, will happen to them. Thus they will be too overwhelmed
with emotion to operate thier ship.
Daniel:
Ensign, that's the stupidest, insanestly, idiotic, dumb idea ever! ...Good
work.
Ensign Dan: Thank you sir.
Gotens(wines):
What about the Gravametrical Disturbances?
(The Pheonix-X sits in space
peacefully)(The dead body of an astronaut floats by)
(Suddenly a Jem'Hadar ship
decloaks in front of them)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Daniel:
Full torpedo bursts.
(The Pheonix-X fires torpedos)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Armond: No hits.
(The Jem'Hadar ship monouvers around the Pheonix-X firing torpedos)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Armond: We're almost outta
torpedos.
Kayl: Shields down to 63%.
Daniel:
...They're learning from watching us. I have a feeling Multi-Vector would
just be a waste of time.
Gotens:
What?
Daniel:
They want us to split into three, haven't you noticed, they always show
up in pairs of twos.
Gotens:
Which means there's another cloaked ship around here...
Kayl: Shields 45%.
Daniel:
Red, set a course for Flortarios III, full impulse. Let's see if your monouvering
capabilities are as good as your records say Lieutenant.
Red: Aye Captian.
Daniel:
Walace, tatical control.
Lieutenant Walace: Aye sir.
Daniel:
Kayl, full sensor readings.
(The Pheonix-X turns around as the Jem'Hadar ship fires at it)(The Jem'Hadar ship follows behind while firing at the Pheonix-X)(The other Jem'Hadar ship decloaks far in front of them)(The Pheonix-X weaves to the left as two torpedos miss)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Armond: Shields at 15%.
Ensign Dan: We're dead.
(The other Jem'Hadar ship
heads for the Pheonix-X in the front)(The Pheonix-X changes course to intercept
it)(The Jem'Hadar ship behind the Pheonix-X accidentally fires torpedos
at the Jem'Hadar ship in front of the Pheonix-X)
(As soon as the front Jem'Hadar
Ship gets close to the Pheonix-X, the Pheonix-X goes into Multi-Vector
mode and separates into three)(The three vectors evacuate the line of fire
and the two Jem'Hadar ships intercept eachother, and explode)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Daniel:
Good work people. Put us back together.
Walace: Aye sir.
Gotens:
Red, continue the course to Flortarios Three.
Daniel:
Engage.
Red: Engaging sir.
(Half way between half way
through the system and Flortarios III)
(The cloaked Battle Crusier
from Flortarios III starts going on impulse to a 1000 kilometers away from
the planet)
(A Travel Pod leaves the
cloaked Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier)
(In the small Travel Pod)
Prime Minister Clingten:
You won't get away with this!!
Pablokinya: Shut up old
man. If you didn't notice, I just saved your life.
Clingten: What are you talking
about?
Pablokinya: You were going
to be taken back to Cardassia, and you know how they like to process people
like you.
Clingten: Oh my.
Pablokinya: Now I get to
hold you hostage at the Underground, where we get to insult you, bring
up issues that make you think about your self being and poke you with sticks!
Clingten: Phew, thank God
you got me in ti--waitaminute, that's as bad as the Cardassians!
(Back at Flortarios III)
(The Jenova fires torpedos
at the Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier)
(On the second Jem'Hadar Battle Crusier)
 |
(On the Crucial)
Gondi: The ship has ceased
fire. It is...spinning around in circles...?
Iviok: What?
Ensign Doyanis: Captian,
there are riots going on down on the planet.
Iviok: Forget them, it's
just thier rebellion.
Doyanis: Captian. The Jem'Hadar's
Ship's warp core is over stabelizing!
(The Jem'Hadar ship explodes)
(On the Cloaked Jem'Hadar
Battle Crusier)
First: All clear going to
warp.
(Posh speaks to Melinook)
Melinook: He's gone!?!
Posh(a Vorta): Yes. This
is all your fault!
Mekintosi: Sir, our ventalation
system is activated.
Melinook: I swear I will
have my revenge on Pablokinya! Aarrggghhh!!! I'm so mad!!
(Melinook takes a phaser
and shoots Mekintosi)
(Everyone in the room starts
acting wierd)
TwoHundreth: Why, this isn't
the bridge of a Battle Crusier, it's the platform for the Mulan setting
at the Disney Planet!!
Sixth(runs around): I'm
naked!! Wooooooooo yeah baby!
Eleventh(in a soft voice):
I know there are no such things as a female Jem'Hadar, but I will become
one! Doctor!
Fifth: Five little Jem'Hadars
jumping on the deck, one jumped off and said...
Ninth(jumps on the Fifth):
What the heck!
Posh: It's obvious that
there is a drug being poored in. Luckily, Vortas aren't affected by most
drugs and poisons.
(Posh goes into the Ready
Room)
Posh(starts doing gymnastics):
It's always been my dream!
(Ship goes to warp and heads
for Cardassia)
(On the Pheonix-X)
Armond: The virus is working,
the ships have stoped firing. I can even detect some cloaked ships, some
of them are self destructing.
Daniel:
Call our fleet back.
(Later...)
(In the Travel Pod)
Clinton(sips his drink):
This is not bad.
Pablokinya: I know. It's
called The Bajoran Trove.
Clington: Mm.
Pablokinya: Here we are,
Flortarios III. The land of the imprisoned. And Gravametrical Disturbances.
(On the Pheonix-X)
(Bridge)
*Cregton: Captian, there's
been a lot of blood shed down here...And what about the Prime Minister!?!?
Daniel:
Oh yeah, I forgot about--I mean, we were just leaving to inspect all the
Jem'Hadar Ships.
Gotens:
You must understand Mr. President, can I call you that?--
*Cregton: Only when I'm
wearing my stars and strips pajamas.
Gotens:
--Most of those ships are set to self ddestruct if the computer notices
the circumstances. The PM could've been killed on anyone of those ships.
*Cregton: This is a dissapointment...now
I must take on the responsiblities of his, have more power...Wohoo!
Kayl: Captian, the Tsunami
and Jenova are leaving now to Starbase 55. But the Hijinx is still afloat.
Daniel:
Don't worry, the Ixion is taking care of them.
(BOB yawns)
Gotens(crosses
his arms): Too bad we couldn't use the technology of Gravametrical Disturbances.
Daniel:
I know, and it's such an interesting concept too.
Ensign Dan: Wanna drink?
Gotens:
No thank you.
Ensign Dan: Commander, you
won't get affected like last time, unless you inhale it.
Gotens:
Huh?
Ensign Dan: When I first
gave you this drink you smelled it first. You're only emotionally struck
when you breathe it in, drinking it has a totally different affect.
Gotens:
How is that possible?
Ensign Dan: When you drink
it, the fluid goes down into your system. When you inhale it, the particles
go anywhere they want in your body, even up to your brain. There's an atom
in the drink particles that's attracted to the emotional part of the brain.
Armond: Captian, I'm detecting
a small Travel Pod with a Jem'Hadar warp signature. Two life forms, it's
the PM and one of the people who kidaped him!!
*Cregton: Doh!
Daniel:
Tractor them. Commander, go see if the Prime Minister is okay.
Gotens:
'Kay. Red, Kayl, you're with me.
Ensign Dan: Do you think
my virus will reach that Jem'Hadar Travel Pod?
(BOB shrugs his shoulders)
(On the Jem'Hadar Travel
Pod)
(Pablokinya puts down his
drink and holds a phaser to the PM's head)
(The Away Team beams aboard)
Pablokinya: Let me down
to the surface or I'll shoot.
Gotens: Gotens to Pheonix-X--
Pablokinya: And if you try
to beam me out I'll shoot.
Kayl: Well then what can
we do?
Pablokinya(burps from the
drink): Well, if our places were switched I'd use the Gravametrical Dis--
Gotens:
Listen. According to Starfleet, this is none of our business. But there
are other ways to resolve your problems on Flortarios III.
Clingten: What are you talking
about?
Gotens:
You've forced your own founders out of your society. Don't you see?
Clingten(hicups from the
drink): We have?
Pablokinya: Yes, you have.
Clingten(picks up his glass):
...Join me in the White House of Commons, we will sort out these problems.
Pablokinya(picks up his
glass): Okay, as long as I get to bring all the representatives and some
party hats.
Clingten: Whatever you need,
we'll solve our predicament. And make sure to bring more of this wonderful
drink!
(On the Pheonix-X)
Ensign Dan(sips his drink):
Did you know that this Bajoran Trove drink helps Bajorans concentrate too?
Daniel:
Maybe that explains your sudden good work. Commander, is everything okay
there?
*Gotens:
Aye Captian...
(On the Travel Pod)
(Pablokinya and Clingten
toast thier drinks)
Gotens:
...Everything's fine.
END
Red: Sir, the ventalation
system has been activated...
(Pause)
Gotens:
...You know, I've always wanted to pilot one of these.
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